*This is I... Jerry, Nitpicking the entire album's flaws to my writings
The Primitive Collection
It was called the Primitive Collection for a reason. It was rushed and it was our first
collection. Will had to leave for the guards overseas, and everything done was printed
and pressed. There were outtakes of course, but only few. I was embarassed to find many
flaws in my writing. This is my admittance at least that I know them, for I don't think
very many if anyone even noticed. But I'm very picky, and I wasn't satisfied.
LITTLE TEA PARTY OF HORRORS
"Let's cut out the bad parts, the whole middle section.
For one, nothing's ripe yet, and I don't want arrested"
An entire song about recipes for cooking a young girl that this creature stumbled upon
in this demented fairy tale that takes place in the woods... If he's eating a young girl's
body parts in various recipes to begin with, I'm pretty sure the whole song is grounds for arrest,
wouldn't you think?
THE LOST NINJA TURTLES
"There was Van Gogh, MC Escher too, Gaudi, Picasso, and that Warhol Dude..."
The man who designed the Leaning tower of Pisa (In this song "Pizza") was not Gaudi, but
someone else. This is what happens when you use the internet to get information.
"Phoenix ain't even in Alabama"
According to Will, I haven't done research on it, there actually is a small town called Phoenix in Alabama.
The original intentional flaw of naming the wrong city for the wrong state was on purpose, to make it rhyme,
then when the error was discovered, it was to be left there, and the afterpart was simply laughing at myself.
In a mock EMINEM "Post-Song Dialogue" like "Fuck it, let's all stand up" in The Real Slim Shady.
But apparently, I was right?
ARMY OF ME, PT 1
"The back to the future writers, however, didn't have precise planning. Cause if Marty
McFly when to the future he just wouldn't be. No future self exists if he got in that time machine."
This is false. If he got into that time machine and went to the future, came back to the present, then relived
the rest of his duration he'd eventually end up in the future again where the time machine initially came.
Thus, I'm totally wrong and Back to the Future, highly respectable writers who wrote the movie, did not
create a movie flaw. Instead, this was just another album flaw in my writing I didn't change in time.
A lot of these flaws I had pointed out but since it was comedy I was told not to worry about them.
I will just think harder about saying something's almost done this time.
This was the very first Will and Jerry song to be recorded. There is a hidden gem as well
as a major flaw. The major flaw was in the beginning. "The Mexicans Do It Best" was meant to
be changed to "The Foreigners Do It Best". What happened was I did the first version, then
Will did something non-mexican (which is what was left there). After this fact, I changed
my line to "the foreigners do it best" and then he made a mexican riff. There were two right
ways to do this and two wrong ways. Unfortunately we were rushed, and this is what came to be on the CD.
As for the hidden gem... Will never heard me rap. I hadn't in years and it naturally happened.
"Put on my leather, fur, and goat skin coats one at a time" is followed by Will, after having been
drinking, falling completely out of his chair onto the floor laughing his ass off. I tried to cut it out
the best I could, but due to the fact part of the vocals would have been missing I would have had to retake
it. So for future fun and trivia, I left a small portion of this in the song.
If you know it's there, you can easily make it out.
This is not a flaw, but a hidden gem as well. There is a local story about a man who was
caught having sex with a cow, behind it, with a bucket, after having feeding it grass. The
girl who caught it in her barn on her farm was named Liz. His name was Joe Hail. You can
hear me whisper loudly "Joe Hail/Hale?" in the dead middle of the song where there aren't
any words for a while, just heavy breathing. This also now explains the line "Liz walks in,
Joe is with a bovine. Utter stroking does something to a man's mind."